Grief by Charity Wicks

This past week marked the 15th anniversary of my mother’s passing, and I honestly cannot believe that that many years have passed. It feels like yesterday that my Dad, sister and I were in that hospital room making a decision I wish upon nobody, and yet somehow it also feels like I’ve lived a lifetime since that day. There’s life before mom died, and life after. And there are so many things she’s missed in my life. She never met Jason. She didn’t see me get my Doctorate, or even my Master’s degree. She never saw me conduct or play a Broadway show. And the most tragic; my kids will never know her kind, generous, fun-loving spirit.

It’s easy to get sucked in to the grief and sadness, and to start to feel sorry for myself. And when those emotions arise, I will let myself feel them. Because it’s sad and awful, and I need to feel those things. We all do. And I know I’m not alone in this experience, which gives me great comfort. And yet, sometimes the loss of someone so very close to us can make us feel isolated and alone, as if nobody else can truly understand the pain and grief we’ve felt. But if there is one thing losing my mother so early in my life taught me, it’s that tomorrow is never guaranteed. We truly only have right now to live our best life, so we better not waste it.

My mother was an incredibly bright light who lived her life to the fullest, and I think the greatest way I can honor her legacy is to do the same with mine. To love harder, to give more, and to spread more light into the world. And I’d be willing to bet that we all knew someone like that who now lives on in our memories. So I ask...What better way is there to honor that life than to continue spreading the brightness that they did? Let them live on through you and all that you do.